My thoughts on Father's Day

I have always had a little trouble with Father's Day. I remember growing up and going to the store to look for a Father's Day Card. I would search and search for one that was appropriate for my dad. I could never find one because they all expounded about how wonderful to have a dad like you, the joy from being loved, the confidence that comes from being believed in, the sense of security that comes from knowing you're there if I need you. I never felt any of these things from my dad so I just ended up getting a card that said "Wishing you a happy Father's Day". I think my dad would love to have shown all these attributes if he had known how to. He was never taught how to show real love. His mother died when he was only eighteen months old and he was raised by a stepmother who did the best that she could having had two children of her own. My dad was born July 25th 1909. My mother was born October 25th 1910. They were married on April 16th 1927 when he was 18 and she was 17. Then followed first born son born June 5th 1928. Second born son January 9th 1930. Third born son September 8th 1932. Fourth born son January 13th 1937 died January 19th 1937. First born daughter November 28th 1939 and fifth born son September 25 th 1941. Most of my memories of my dad was of him being drunk. That is not to say that he didn't have times of being sober he did but they were few. When he was drunk he was mean. But when he was sober we had so much fun and we would do things like go camping and fishing and drive to the mountains. As I get older the bad times seem to fade and the good times seem more predominate. But when I think of Father's Day I think of my brothers who where really my father figure they didn't let the alcoholism past down to them and control their lives although a couple of them struggled with it. Each of my brothers as well as myself have managed to live productive lives and produce children and grandchildren who have graduated college and gone on to be people we are proud of.
So I suppose I have written all of this just to say that I am so proud of my brothers. They have always been there for me, each in his own way and I do love them for it. Some may think it is tough being the only girl in a family of four brothers....well you are right. They hold me to such high esteem that I have to watch every move that I make. They don't like to think that I could say anything that would be unlady like. But I can. They think that everything I do is perfect. But its not. I am a real person who has many flaws but my brothers don't think that I do and I love them for it. It keeps me on my toes. So this Father's Day I want to honor my brothers...Charles who is in heaven, Bill who I grow to love more each day, Ben Jr. who has always had my heart. and Joe who is so refreshing and makes me laugh.
Happy Father's Day My Brothers. and remember....not all our memories are good ones, but the good ones are the ones we want to remember. And our daddy loved us as much as he was capable of loving.
I love you,
your sister